OTF's Blue Publication April 2006
Hey hey, welcome to the new Bothan Report on recent Senate activity!
Because AJ has been sent on a typical diplomatic mission to intercept trans... gressions... made by the government of Commenor against some laws that I'm hoping Hobbie will have invented by the time I finish typing this - Keep stalling, sweetheart, I'm not quite done yet! - well, since AJ's off doing that, I'm the one writing this. Don't like it? Pray that we do not alter things any further!
Please do listen to her. I've done enough altering as it is, she tends to react violently to complaints and I'm the one standing next to her. At least you can still stand, count yourself lucky.
Moving on! The Senate has been unusually qui... well behaved this month. Quite possibly, this is due to the fact that the last time Osiris and Hobbie tried to stir things up a bit, they got into a bit of trouble. It was just a standard takeover attempt, I still don't see what the big deal is, it happens on a weekly basis... But at least being on forced leave gives me time to plot the next one. Anyone interested, feel free to join in by emailing takeovers_sw@admin.outpost10f.com, we need doers in our organisation. Yeah, he's not too good with the actual dirty work. *g* Being filthy has some disadvantages, I found out. I don't want to know! Let me get on with this already, IÂ’m trying to be serious.
At the start of the month, we did have some excitement and a bit of
consternation when we sent Iain to be plugged into the hyperdrive. However, since we put Eagle
in charge of it, he plugged Iain into OTF by mistake. The result, as you probably all saw,
was that Iain transformed TF into a Matrix chatroom. This move had unexpected effects on
the Cantina - the rank system was turned on its head and everyone logging in got random
ranks for the whole day, until we managed to fix it.
It was madness; people were being promoted and demoted within seconds, and Iain as commodore was as
scary a sight as I ever want to see. As a result, Eagle has been sent to an
intensive course to bring him up to date on Star Wars technology, while Iain was forced to
go through the entire OTF code to spot bugs. As he seems to have enjoyed that a little too much,
we are currently looking into other means to torment him. Yeah, who would've thought
bug-watching could be so enjoyable. Maybe we should stick him head first into an ant hill,
then he can watch real bugs. Sounds good, I'll add it to the list of suggestions.
Keep them distracted while I do so. Or dress him up as a flower and deposit him near
a bee hive... *dreams* I like the sound of that. 'Make it so'? *g*
You just like the thought of seeing Iain as a flowergirl. It'd be pretty
disturbing, but think about the incriminating pictures... I'd prefer not to, thanks.
Anyway, moving along! We did get the whole mess fixed in the end, and AJ's lawyer training finally came in handy when he managed to come up with a convenient excuse. Rumour has it that some people weren't best pleased at losing their new ranks, but those people have been silenced. We can thank Jaden and Osiris for that. Most of the weapons in the armoury ended up having to be discarded due to having been overused but, overall, it was worth it. Mhmm... fireworks... ...in parking lots... I mean landing platforms. Hey, wait a sec, is that why we have the new armory? It's all falling together now... Took you long enough to catch on. Iain still believes the excuse AJ came up with, about some malfunction in the double-bladed lightsaber that spread to the rest of the weapons, so keep the real reason under wraps. Like usual, got it. And you've managed to distract me now, what am I supposed to be writing about? Uhm, I have no idea? It's not like it's my job to know what the update's meant to be on... I'll beat you till you do know! Wait, this isn't my top ten favourite ways to harm Hobbie, is it? It's all coming back to me now!
In other Senate related news, Bria and Hobbie are rumoured to have arranged a clandestine meeting
somewhere in the South Passage Europe only recently. No information has been forthcoming
as to what was discussed at this meeting, but a few patrons around OTF have been overheard voicing
a bad feeling about the whole affair. The Senate is, consequently,
officially denying all such rumors, obviously made up by Man in Hat, to keep the spotlight
off Iain visiting his "relatives". The situation is being taken care of as our lawyers are
pleading a diplomatic mission aimed at opening new trade lanes between Adumar and Corellia,
based on evidence cunningly faked by QD and Majin. Ah yes, the good old diplomatic
missions. Whoever invented that term deserves a medal. Or to be shot, probably both.
Well, we can give him a medal and then shoot him. Much like the awards ceremony at Yavin 4...
except with shooting. Or we can give QD the medal and shoot Majin, that works too.
Works with me. Hey, do you think people are still reading? If they are, I both pity
and applaud them. I definitely don't envy them. But we should get back to that diplomatic
mission, anyway, and sorting out the various medals and shootings and professors lurking
around with power flux cables. All the while avoiding the wrath of all those
people glaring at us for hijacking the update, yes. Excuse me, who hijacked the update?
I was doing well till you turned up! Which didn't take long.
Anyway, that's it for this month folks, I promise that things will be slightly more tame next time around! As for me, I'll go and instill some diplomacy in Hobbie now.
The CCC's Duo Infernale,
Bria Terrik
Senator of Corellia
and
Hobbie
Senator of Adumar