Oh. Hello again!
It's that time of the month again, so we shall delve into the abyss once more. By which I mean, welcome to this month's edition of the Blue Report!
We have the usual assortment of interviews, updates, comics and other stuff for you this month - even a guest article by the illustrious and ever-radiatn Aeon. Yep, you get all that as well as something special: an introduction by me. But you already knew that, so it's kind of pointless for me to tell you that. I did anyway, though. So there!
41 hours without sleep = lose.
...anyway, it's been quite a fun month, as far as I've been able to tell. I've not really been paying too much attention. =) I do, however, know that sugar, salt and pepper mixed with milk don't taste very good, and that you should be careful about what you tell your friends about people. All sorts of strange situations come about if you don't watch out.
But I shan't ramble on anymore, firstly because I have another article to write, and secondly because the chances of having my keyboard
stolen set on fire increase exponentially to the amount of time I spend at this.
I'll see you below for the Senate update!
Over at the OZD the OZD is sad to see CL8 Iain step down as ST DSC to take on his new role as InDev Director. While Iain will be staying on in the OZD (yay!) he will definitely be missed as Man in the Hat's chief henchman. =) The OZD wishes Iain the best of luck in his new role and look forward to all of the new exciting things we're sure will come from InDev with Iain in charge... ;)
With Iain's stepping down, the OZD is inviting applicants for the ST DSC role. Contact Brady and Iain, following the instructions on the Departmental Updates Board if interested!
Beyond that the OZD is coming up with new rank schemes. CL5 Aeon started the ball rolling with her new Borg rank scheme and the OZD is starting to compile a list of new ranks from Vulcans to Klingons. Stay tuned for further updates.
With the recent change in dossier departmental headings, the OZD has implemented a change in TF ranks as well. Previously, OZD members held "Agent" as their ranks, however, the OZD felt that "Agent" wasn't really representative of the OZD and really, we just wanted to blend in more. :D So now your friendly Agent is easily identifiable by his/her dossier and we're back to normal ranks once again. Though I do miss being a "special" agent...LOL
Enjoy the Halloween theme in TF and all the best!
For this month,
OZD Blue Report Editor
What an exciting month it's been! There was plenty of adventure, fun, and a healthy dose of craic. When it came to OTF's Senate, however, I'm afraid not much happened at all. We did talk about doing stuff, but as is a political body's wont, we never actually got around to doing any of it.
To divert attention from that regretful lack, here's a monkey on a bike. Brings back memories, doesn't it? But enough about my doomed expedition to Vilnius. That's another story. A story featuring a dancing man with a biiiig ...beard. Speaking of stories, though, I can tell you that in the Senate this month, there are no stories to tell. I feel like I've just gone in a circle. Maybe it's just because I'm dizzy. Or maybe I'm dizzy because I went in a circle; I'll leave you to make up your own minds on that one. I'm too dizzy to. Officially, anyway.
Have you ever stopped to consider which piece of grammar is the most attractive? I, myself, am partial to a good colon. However, a nice pair of parenthasis also tickle my fancy. I once met a man who liked the question mark, which is just plain weird. I ate his face. Ha. He didn't look all that great to begin with, though. And he had it coming to him anyway! But speaking of helicopters, here is the winner of the British regional facial hair competition. It made me choke. On coffee. I shouldn't drink so much coffee. Or Sambuca. On that note, I am reliably informed that eating Cream Crackers with refrigerated curry sauce isn't a good idea.
In conclusion: Nothing happened, we're boring, go read something else. Thanks.
1.Why do you think you won the award?
Because they didn't have an award for what it is I do around here and they just had to pick something unrelated in order to reward me for my efforts on the Blue Report. *l* I MIGHT be your most controversial interview...
2. What do you plan to do with your shiny award?
Bury it with all the other ones so that no one will ever know about it. Deep deep beneath Iain's underwear drawer. Where no sane person would ever go.
3. Anything else you'd like to add/dedicate this award to?
To Brady, for keeping the rolling of his eyes to a minimum when he gets an email from me demanding to know why on earth he's trying to give me an award for doing something else entirely.
I actually hadn't even been in chat the entire month for which I won the award. Maybe it was a "thanks for not buggin' us!" award.
Either that or a deliberate attempt to make pols mainstream ;)
Maybe. A bit odd though...giving the "patron" award to someone who hadn't been patroning anything but a fancy pants resort in mexico...mmmm...pina coladas...
Thanks Pols! :)
She's got a funky name, she's a rare sight these days, she spreads joy and smiles wherever she goes (even if she doesn't know what a gaff is)... October's SW Patron of the Month is none other than CL5 RPMObsession! I found her hiding in the Guilds catacombs reading The Aeneid, and scared some answers out of her... see below!
1. Congrats on the award! Why do you think you won it?
I have no idea. It could be because I'm so awesome. =P
2. What kind of work do you usually do around the gaff, then?
I work in Music Guild as TL, and I'm an Artist's Guild member.
3. If you weren't doing that... what would you be doing?
aving a life and hanging out with my friends.
4. "RPMObsession" - I think many people have asked themselves about that. How'd you come up with that name?
Well, I use to get really bored in my 7th grade Science class, and I was known for my music knowledge. It's always been a big part of my life, so I was trying to come up with a screenname that would reflect that. And, voila! I came up with RPMObsession - Rock, Punk, Metal Obsession. I even came up with a symbol for it. *l* As you can tell, I was really bored.
5. What do you imagine OTF would be like if it was actually real?
An all night rave club equipped with alcohol, weird music, and weird people.
6. If you could take one part of OTF and transfer it to real life, which part would you pick?
My music guild work. That way I can put it down for work experience. *l*
7. Finally... which colour Skittles taste the best?
They all taste the same to me, but I like the color red, so the red ones.
I'd like to thank RPMObsession for obliging me with answers on this one.
I didn't really scare the answers from her. Honest.
...just a bit. =(
Bria Terrik (CL7)
Senator of Corellia
For the month of November we have CL6 Dmitri as our rankette of the month...:
What are you waiting for? Submit your rank here!
27. INT. LARS HOMESTEAD - DINING AREA. TABLE FOR THREE, SIR?
Osiris's Aunt Billy Bob, a warm, motherly woman, fills a pitcher with blue milky goodness from a refrigerated container in the well-used kitchen. She puts the pitcher on a tray with some bowls of frosties doubling for futuristic food and starts for the dining area. Osiris sits with his Uncle Octavius before a table covered with more steaming bowls of non-descript food as Aunt Billy Bob carries in a bowl of red grain. That's a lot of food for three people. I wonder what the red grain is, sounds crunchy...
You know, I think that AJ unit we bought might have been stolen.
What makes you think that? Have you been eavesdropping on the Imperial Stormtrooper scanner again?
Well, I stumbled across a recording while I was cleaning him, it might just be malware, but he also says he belongs to someone called Ma-Jin Kenobi.
Octavius is greatly alarmed at the mention of this name and spits blue milk across the table, but manages to control himself by slapping his face with a spoon.
I thought he might have meant old Ben. Do you know what he's talking about? Well, I wonder if he's related to Ben... though, two people called Ben in one family is just plain stupid.
Octavius breaks loose with a fit of uncontrolled anger and blue milk bubbles from his left nostril.
OCTAVIUS That old man's just a crazy old wizard, he runs around shouting "You shall not pass!" at Sandpeople. Tomorrow I want you to take that AJ unit into Anchorhead and have its memory flushed down the toilet. That'll be the end of it. It belongs to us now, I have a receipt.
But what if this Ma-Jin comes looking for him?
He won't, I don't think he exists any more. He died about the same time as your father. Though I have just intimated I didn't know him in the first place... drat.
He knew my father?
I told you to forget it, you should have your memory flushed down the pan, too. Meantime, your only concern is to prepare the new droids for tomorrow. In the morning I want them on the south ridge working out those condensers... and burning the new Village People album to CD.
Yes, sir. I think those new droids are going to work out fine, even if one's bonkers and the other's sarcastic. In fact, I, uh, was also thinking about our agreement about my staying on another season in this hellhole. And, if these new droids do work out, I want to transmit my application to the Academy this year.
Octavius's face becomes a scowl, although he tries to suppress it with more slaps from the spoon.
You mean the next semester (where are we, college?) before harvest?
Sure, there're more than enough droids.
Harvest is when I need you the most, who else will drive the tractor. Only one more season. This year we'll make enough on the harvest so I'll be able to hire some more hands - not the body, just the hands. And then you can go to the Academy next year.
Osiris continues to toy with his food (who wouldn't on a diet of frosties and red grain), not looking at his uncle.
You must understand I need you here, Osiris. Besides, off-planet you'll lose the blond streaks in your hair.
But it's a whole 'nother year, and I've run out of moisturising conditioner!
Look, it's only one more season. I've been stuck here years.
Osiris pushes his half-eaten plate of food aside and stands, knocking over the blue milk.
Yeah, that's what you said last year when James and Tank-girl left.
AUNT BILLY BOB
Where are you going? Look at the blue milk, it stains, you know!
It looks like I'm going nowhere (Emo strop) I have to finish cleaning those droids.
Resigned to his fate, Osiris paddles (paddles? I didn't think there was that much milk!) out of the room. Octavius mechanically finishes his dinner, (I think he's using a chainsaw as a knife).
AUNT BILLY BOB
Octavius, he can't stay here forever. Most of his friends have gone doo-lally or left. It means so much to him to get away from this sticking pit of despair and factor 100 sunblock.
I'll make it up to him next year. I promise. Maybe I'll buy him a Playstation 4000.
AUNT BILLY BOB
Osiris's just not a farmer, Octavius. He has too much of his father in him.
That's what I'm afraid of more than blue milk.
Probably not. And I'm getting off the track, so I really should start with the story about the rank charts. On another long night, I was clicking my way around the Outpost to find bugs and broken links, because I wanted to spam Iain again with one of my notorious "suggestion mails", when I found the rank charts. This instantly aroused my curiosity, as I was thinking: "Yeah, this is the best suggestion ever. Let's play with it." And believe me, it wasn't only a game at all.
The Bajoran ranks have been really easy to make, as there are lots of resources as well as an already established rank chart as seen on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. So, it's been the Borg who
assimilated turned me into a philosopher, as I was thinking about the idea of re-equipping their chart. One important question, brought up by a fellow agent, was there to deal with: "Does a collective, that denies individuality, really use ranks to separate each other?" And my answer to this is simply "No, of course not. But they do have designations". And that was the literal push in the right direction. I remembered an episode from Star Trek: Voyager, which was called "Survival Instinct". For the first time, the audience was able to see a small example of the Borg hierarchy, as it featured the terms 'subjunct', 'adjunct' and 'processor'. A tactical drone, mixed with Locutus and the Queen, a suggestion by Zild to change a certain rank, and the rank cocktail was ready.
After the work was done, Brady and I were enjoying the OZD staff picnic, chilling and relaxing on a sunny afternoon (a holographic one, of course) when he suddenly said: "Why don't you write an article about it? I'm sure, you put a lot of thinking into the justification behind your ideas for the subgenres and it'd be a shame not to put your thoughts out there!"
This made me think for a couple of days about my reasons and the question, if the Borg really have a hierarchy, or if it was foolish to think, that we should implement individual ranks for the chat. A discussion with another OTF member brought me to a conclusion. It doesn't matter at all, if a fictional species from a TV series, based on a collective mind, has or needs individual ranks or not, and that was not the reason why I've done the work. I have played with the rank chart because I like to give ideas to improve OTF's Star Trek genre. But after all, I have made it for fun purposes only, because I was tired of all these "drones" around and it was quite a challenge to find all these Borg ranks. My justification is, that some of us like the Borg pretty much and would use their ranks - for fun purposes, again. So, let's not waste too much energy on a debate of principles if a collective has some shades of individuality or not. Let's just enjoy the new Borg ranks and have fun. Because that's exactly what we all are here for - right?
Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix One-Zero